A lot has happened since my last blog! Unfortunately, not on here!!
I suppose in some ways we can become so busy that we lose sight of what is important. This is more serious when you are a leader of a church!
I have been blessed over the last seven years in the way that God has always led and guided me in leading His church, and looking back over those times, I am amazed on how much He has accomplished. I am also embarrassed by the times I thought I had it sorted and thought I could do things my way in my strength!
Over time there is the danger that things become so routine that you do things without thinking, or even worse, pray about things without thinking. We run through the gratitudes and platitudes that we believe is "going through the right motions" only to realize that we have been operating in a sort of "autopilot" mode.
Well, in the Baptist world, it is usual for a minister to take time out during a sabbatical year to take a step back from routine and seek the Lord. A wise friend recently told me that during my sabbatical I was not to seek what God wants me to do next, but just to seek God ... to re-acquaint myself with the intimacy of God ... to draw so close to Him as to hear His heartbeat!
Well that's what I intend to do! However, my situation is not the same as a full-time minister who would normally take three months out to do this. As lay-pastor in full-time employment in a secular job, I do not have the option of taking three months away from church responsibilities and my career, so instead I am taking a year out of church leadership whilst continuing my other full-time job!
I feel the Lord is calling me to draw close to Him, to renew my strength and to find that first love in Him. I need to spend more time with Him!
Now here is the paradox. One would think spending more time in church would allow you to spend more time with God. Well yes, on one hand it does, but if you are in a pastoral or leadership role, a large portion of your time is spent serving others as you serve God. Things can get so busy that you end up spending more time serving others that you forget that it is God you are serving. Now before I start getting comments on here that they are the same thing, I am alluding to the fact that without time with God on a "one-to-one" with Him, you are unable to serve Him to the best of His ability through you! If you don't know the Master, how can you serve Him!
God has spoken clearly to me in recent months that my time serving as pastor at SBC is to draw to a close at the end of June. He is calling me to spend the time I would usually spend in preparation for ministry and all the other meetings, visits etc., with Him over the next year. I don't know what He is calling me to do at the end of my sabbatical year, but I do know that I am to draw closer to Him now.
There are blessings in being obedient to God, but that doesn't always make it easy. I have taken a few more weeks than I should have to respond to what God has been calling me to do! I have been hesitant in letting others know, I have been, in some ways, reluctant to let go of the church as it has been a very large part of my life for the last seven years. However, now that I have finally acted upon that calling, I am at peace with it and although a little saddened on leaving this family I have been entrusted with, I am excited with what the next twelve months have in store for me! So if you see me sitting on a hillside somewhere, or wondering on some pilgrimage in Lindisfarne or Iona, or on a retreat somewhere, know that I am seeking to know my God more intimately, more deeply as He has called me to.
Please pray for me and my family as this will be a major paradigm shift in the household as we move from this family and to the new spiritual home God is preparing for us. Pray that in my final month at SBC, I will stop weeping long enough to get through my final two Sunday morning services. I love these folks to bits, but I need to let go!
Finally, I want you to journey with me, as I endeavour to keep this blog more updated than previously, sharing my thoughts, experiences and encounters with God over the next twelve months.
In His Majesty's Service
Pastor Pete.
